Hi Working Girls!

Hope this Tuesday is turning out to be a good and productive one! Mine has been full of free pizza (the highlight of my day), dreary rain and an even drearier attitude. Hoping tomorrow picks up!

But we have some good news! And that is that we have a new blogroll! Yippee! It’s full of fun blogs and websites that WG1 and I visit on a daily basis so you know that means they are the shiznit.

Have any suggestions for more good women + career-focused reads to add to the blogroll? Email us at workinggirlone@gmail.com or workinggirltwo@gmail.com.

Recently, I had a job interview.

I haven’t been looking looking for a new job but I a position caught my eye at a company I admired so I applied. I didn’t think I’d get an interview but I did. And I was very excited.

After updating my portfolio, researching the company and picking out my interview outfit I felt ready to go.

When I was I greeted by my interviewers in the lobby, I could tell they were not into me at all. Throughout the interview, they didn’t listen and asked me questions that completely contradicted answers I’d just given them. I’m pretty sure they hadn’t even read my resume before I came in. They weren’t bad interviewers. In fact, I could probably learn a thing or two from the questions they were asking. The ones that weren’t contradictory, of course.

They were just not that into me. And I wasn’t into them. While I was slightly offended by their apathy, that wasn’t the only reason I wasn’t into them. They had a too cool for school attitude that I was not cool, or uncool (?), enough for. The office was dark and daunting. It just wasn’t the right fit.

So, after the interview, what is a Working Girl to do?

Normally, I would get to my back to computer whip up nice “thank you” note further explaining my interest in the position and why I am the perfect candidate for it. But I’m not interested and I’m not the perfect candidate. I thought about writing a note thanking them and withdrawing myself from the candidate pool but that felt a little presumptuous. I couldn’t have written my normal note but that would of been a complete lie.

Instead, I just didn’t follow-up. This is probably a huge Working Girl faux-pas. Ok, it is definitely a faux-pas. It’s the easiest way to get written off. But in this case, I’m fine with being written off. Although I probably already was.

It’s been a year since I was let go from the company I had worked for since I gradated from college. Before college, if you count my summer internship. It’s been an interesting year. After three months of job interviewing, I started freelancing at a magazine. I was offered a job at a start-up and then offered a second job when I informed the magazine. I picked one of those jobs and have been working since. But this post isn’t about what has happened in the last year. It’s about what happened the day I was let go.

Now, let me preface, this is not a “this is my side of the story” or “I’m going to make them feel bad because maybe they are still reading this here blog” post. Yes, it is my story but I don’t know, and probably never will know, the other side of the story and if anyone feels bad, it’s not my intention.

It was a shitty situation and this is just what happened, how I dealt with it and what I learned from it. The first thing my dad said to me when I called him with the news was “the first time is the hardest.” The first time?!? People are getting laid off left and right lately, maybe it will happen to you or a friend, maybe it already has. I’m simply sharing my story for the same reason Working Girl Two and I share all of our stories: So other Working Girls can hopefully learn something from our experience or just to know that someone else went through it too. So, here it goes.

About a month or so before I was let go, I started looking for a new job. I knew it was my time to move on. I’d been with the company for more than three years, started as a sales assistant and quickly worked up the ranks to a manager. I knew I’d grown as much as I could there. I also felt that my boss was treating me differently and something was up, but I brushed it off as just usual office stress.

But I knew, or my gut did. When my vacation request for the holidays wasn’t approved in a timely manner, I knew something was up. I joked to Promo Girl (remember her?), who had recently left the company, that my boss wasn’t approving my request because I wouldn’t be here for the holidays.

The weekend before I was let go, at a friend’s wedding, there were some alcohol-induced tears as I told my boyfriend that I was convinced I was getting fired. “No, no,” everyone told me. “They love you, they’d never let you go,” they said.

That day started like most of the others leading up to it. A coworker, who is also a good friend, and I were headed to a meeting about an upcoming event. I went into my boss’s office to let her know that I was heading out the meeting. I was expecting the usual “OK, see you later” but instead I got a seemingly frantic “when are you coming back?” I told her and headed out with my coworker who immediately said “that was weird.” It was weird. My response, I’m not even making this up, was, verbatim, “she probably wants to know what I’m getting back because she’s going to fire me this afternoon.”

That afternoon, HR called just as the same coworker popped over to my desk. They asked if I could come down to meet with them. I hung up the phone and told my coworker who called. I’ll never forget the look of shock on her face.

I headed to HR. My boss was there, with the HR rep, and the rest is a bit of a blur. My position was being eliminated because of lack of upcoming events (wasn’t I just at a meeting about an upcoming event?), they were sorry, if I need anything they are there for me. I started crying immediately even though I swore I wouldn’t during my elevator ride to HR. My boss left and the HR rep went over my severance package, next steps, etc. all while handing me tissues.

After going over all of the details, she led me to a conference room where I could make any phone calls I needed and pull myself together. I called my boyfriend. Then I called Promo Girl. She told me to do two things. First, ask HR if I could leave and come back at the very end of the day to pack my things and have them call one of my coworkers and ask her to bring down my purse, ID, phone, etc. Second, go get a USB device so I can pull anything I need from my computer. Not in the take everything you can kind of way, in the you’re going to be apply for jobs and need examples of work kind of way. This second piece of advice I forgot to follow and wish I hadn’t. As easy as it was get materials that I needed from my old coworkers, I would have been nice not to have to bug them I was frantically looking for something that I needed for a job application or follow-up.

I did follow the first piece of advice. My coworker brought me my things, comforted me as best she could, offered to stay late to be there while I packed my things. I went to Central Park to call my mom and my dad. I barely remember the conversations just that I was the crazy girl hysterically crying in the park. After finally killing enough time, two hours that felt like ten, I headed back to the building. A few people in my department were still there but my coworker who brought me my purse told them to leave me alone (some didn’t listen, wasn’t too thrilled about that). I did my final expense report because, fun fact, if your expenses aren’t up to date, you don’t get your severance, and packed up my things, mostly shoes (so many shoes!).

I’d gone from crazy girl crying in the park to bag lady on 8th Avenue searching for a cab. There was NO way I was getting on the subway. After 15 minutes of cab searching, I finally found one and began my trip home. When I was finally sitting in the comfort of a cab (for the record, this is the only time I’ve ever found a cab comforting), I realized I had a pounding migraine and couldn’t wait to get home and feel sorry for myself. What should have been a 10-minute ride turned in a 45-minute ride, thanks President Obama for being in town that day, it was awesome. I deleted my work email from phone. One would think that that would somehow happen automatically happen when one is let go.

When I got home, I wallowed. I needed to wallow and just get it all out. The next day, a Friday, was weird. I didn’t have to wake up early. I didn’t have anywhere to be. I stayed at home, took a mental health day, if you will, before letting myself worry about money or job searching.

It might be cheesy, but I believe everything happens for a reason. I was ready to leave my job and I did, it just wasn’t on my terms. And I needed a push. I’d been on two job interviews before I was let go and I came back from both feeling that maybe I wasn’t totally ready to leave. I’m still not completely over what happened, but it doesn’t upset me the way it did six months ago. Writing this post, I got a little shaky and a pit in my stomach reliving the emotions.

Remember that episode of Sex and the City when Charlotte tells the girls that it takes half the time you were in a relationship with someone to get over them? That’s how I feel about getting over being let go. I’m still working through it. I no longer think about it daily and I no longer worry “will I ever get over it?” I know I will. It just takes time.

When WG1 and I were living in Hoboken, I had a nice little walk to get to the PATH which took me over to NYC. During this walk every morning, I used to think about all the places I would rather be than on the way to my job. And it wasn’t a, “Oh man, I really wish I was in Barbados right about now” or “Wouldn’t it be nice if I had the day off to sit around in my PJs?”

No, this was serious low point shit.

During my walk, I would pass grocery stores, cleaners, gyms, and little shops. And I would say to myself, “Please, you could own a bar. How hard is owning a bar? I should open a bar like tomorrow so I don’t have to go to work at X Company anymore.” Or I would think, “Chinese food? I could make Chinese food? I could even deliver Chinese food. Yea, I could deliver Chinese food. That would be great!” The kicker…at one point I actually thought, “I could work at a cleaners. Ironing clothes sounds fun!”

Like really. I thought ironing clothes all day in a hot cleaners sounded like a terrific job next to my 9 to 6 marketing job where I basically sat at my desk and answered phones and emails. Talk about a cushy job compared to manual hard labor.

But that’s when I know I hit a low point. My low point was thinking I would rather quit my job and get a job delivering Chinese food.

Today was another one of those low points for me. I’m chalking it up to a lot of changes going at my current company and within my department specifically. I’m sure tomorrow will be better.

But today I would rather have had a job at a cleaners.

I’m not a phone girl. As you may already know.

I’ll take e-mail over a phone conversation any day. Unfortunately, my job requires that I talk on the phone. But there is one thing I hate more than talking on the phone.

It’s voicemail.

Is there really anything worse than leaving your desk to use the bathroom or talk to a coworker for just a few minutes only to come back to that dreaded red light? OK, yes, there are many things that are worse. But you know what mean.

You see that red light and don’t know who the message is from or what they want. With email you have the benefit of a subject line.

Sometimes, leaving a voicemail makes sense. Introducing yourself to a new contact. Following up with someone who hasn’t responded to an email or two. But a message to say you got my e-mail and will answer my question soon? Not really necessary.

Fortunately for me, at work our voicemail also goes to our email. So while I eventually have to listen to the messages, I can mark that sucker as read and the red light on my phone disappears!

Lately I have been a procrastinating queen. I can’t help it, one minute I’m super focused and the next I just want to troll the Internet for stupid things to do. Sometimes you just need a few hours to clear your head, get a fresh start, or seriously you have nothing to do at work. So here are some sites that help me “clear my head” while I’m procrastinating at work.

Refinery 29

Fashion, fashion, more fashion. And oh yea Refinery 29 has news tidbits and if you live in Chicago, NYC, San Fran or LA you can get info about new restaurants in your area, store openings, events and other great going-ons in your area. I especially love reading the segment 5 Things to Know This AM.

Hype Machine

I spend hours on Hypem everyday. It’s a site that aggregates a bunch of music blogs into one site so you can listen to new music. You can sort by indie, electronica, rock, hip-hop. This is a fun site to also just get you pumped up for that next project too.

IMDB & iTunes Trailers

I love movies. No lie, probably more than the normal person. So keeping up with the latest going-ons on the movie world is a must for me. I like to check the Internet Movie Database or iTunes Trailers site for any new trailers that are out or just to check in on what my favorite actor is up to. Greatest example, I watched the Breaking Dawn trailer 3 times already. #addiction

Vimeo 

Talk about a time suck. Vimeo is just a place to find fun, creative videos like Marcel the Shell and not gonna lie a whole ton of engagement videos. I can’t help but watch them. Why. can’t. I. stop???

Much like with supplies, the month of September signifies the need for a new wardrobe. Now, this Working Girl is trying to save more, a lot more. But that doesn’t mean I can’t dream of the items I would purchase if I had the extra income and do a little internet window shopping, right?

So to ease you into the work week, I thought I’d share with you some of the outfits I’m currently coveting for autumn. Related: is it really September 12th already?! This month is FLYING!

1. J. Crew Tee, 2. Michael Kors Bracelet, 3. J. Crew Skirt, 4. Ann Taylor Pumps

1. La Garconne Tote, 2. Dorothy Perkins Dress, 3. Jennifer Zeuner Necklace, 4. BCBG Pumps

1. Haute Hippie Blouse, 2. H&M Tank, 3. Max Studio Trousers, 4. Kate Spade Bag, 5. Jessica Simpson Pumps, 6. Michael Kors Watch

1. Marc by Marc Jacobs Sweater, 2. Calypso Scarf, 3. 7 for all Mankind Jeans, 4. Aldo Loafers, 5. Cole Haan Bag

I travel a lot for work.

When most people hear this they get all swoon-worthy about it. “Omg, you’re so lucky!” and gush on and on about how they wish they traveled. To be honest, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Traveling for work has its perks and downfalls like most things. The biggest downfall being that you’re working. Period. End of story. Another downfall is that usually I’m traveling doing site visits or planning events or working a trade show. Which means that after work, I usually have more work to do – like the day-to-day mundane stuff that is easy to get done at a desk rather than a hotel room.

(Quick side story, I was actually in San Diego last week for a trade show and when I got back my co-workers asked me how my “vacation” was. I was on a work trip people. But I digress.)

But obviously the biggest perk of getting to travel for your job is that you do get to see a new place and if you plan your work trip correctly you can make it seem like a mini-vacation (which is why my coworkers all thought I was on a joy ride in Cali last week).

Plan, Plan, Plan

This is one of my biggest recommendations. Before you go, research the area you’re staying in. Even if you can’t stay in a fun hotel, try to stay in a hip, but touristy area of the city you’re in so you can walk around after work and explore. Before I go on a work trip, I usually try and find the best restaurants in the city and map out of the fun areas to explore and see what I could do after-hours. For example, on a site visit in Napa I heard about a cute cafe and made sure to stop there in between hotel visits for lunch. And in San Diego, I knew I would have a free afternoon after setting up our booth and found out that the ferry to Coronado left from the convention center so went over to the beach after my work day. It’s all about planning ahead!

Be a Foodie

I find the best way to explore a city is through my stomach. Cause I loves me some food. But honestly, eating out is an easy way to make your work trip feel like a mini-vacation. Instead of ordering room service, go out and try a nice restaurant (and you get to expense it!). You don’t even need to go to a super nice place – on this last trip, I scouted out some burger bars and a bar known for their craft beer and my bills were both below $20.

Extend It

The most obvious way to make your work trip a vacation…make it an actual vacation. If I’m going to a place I’ve never been before for work, I sometimes will tack on an extra few days to explore the city myself. I did this when I went to Aspen for work and it was a really relaxing day of hiking up a mountain (and by hike I mean I took a gondola) and a spa treatment. Great end to a stressful week of working a show and client dinners.

So those are some of my tips! Hope those help in making your next work trip a mini-vacay!

OK, now before anyone gets their panties in a bunch, I said SOMETIMES! And hear me out.

They say you should do what you love, right? Well, I love to do the following things: Plan meals, plan menus, cook, bake, clean (kind of), organize things, plan trips and activities (i.e. day trip to the beach, apple picking in the fall), decorate, throw parties (birthday, dinner, all of the above) and wear an apron. I love wearing an apron.

I also love kids. Not just in the “Oh sure, kids are great, I think I’ll have some one day” kind of way. In the “I’ve babysitting since I was 11 (OK, I was a Mother’s Helper at 11, full-fledged babysitter at 13), was a summer nanny, went on family vacations with the families I worked for” kind of way. I have a pretty good idea of what I’d be getting into.

When work gets me down or I’m tired of commuting and I think of my future, I think that I wouldn’t hate being a housewife. I think I’d like it and that I’d be good at it.

Now, I am aware that this is extremely unrealistic. The days are long gone where having a stay-at-home parent is the norm. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of people who don’t want that lifestyle.

Recently, I was out with a group of my girlfriends from college and we almost all agreed that in an ideal situation, we would not work full-time after having kids.

Not one of us was very adamant about having a career. We might just be in that quarter-life crisis stage (we are all 26 this year) and the idea of working full-time for eternity is a little daunting.

Or, are there a lot of young women who feel this way? And does it say something about our generation? I wonder if there is a niche in our age group that has seen the career struggles of women before us and would like to opt out of that lifestyle. Working Girls before us paved the way so we could have opportunities and choices. But given those choices, how many of us would rather be housewives?

A year ago I would have told you that I planned on being Super Working Mom one day. Now, I’m not so sure. Do I still want that or would I be content as a housewife? What I enjoy doing falls under the housewife category. But the reality is, I will likely be a working mother whenever the time comes. Which is WAY down the road so it’s far too early to really be worrying about this.

But yeah. After a terrible day at work, I’ve thought “I just want to be a housewife.”

This happens to me every time I go work a trade show (so about three times a year). I think to myself, “Sales. I could do sales. Pssssh. I could be amazing at sales. Why don’t I do sales?”

The reasoning behind my belief that I wouldn’t be so half bad at sales. Well to put it frankly, I sometimes pull in more leads at these trade shows than our legit day-to-day sales people do. And then about once a year, our team members go on ride-alongs. This means that we go on sales calls – prospecting, closing deals, and saving clients from leaving. Today was one of those days. Today I thought I probably could have done better than the person I shadowed with just a tiny bit of training.

So then I start to think about being a salesperson. I think about how I like to be around people. I like to make people like me and socializing in general. The phone doesn’t scare me. I write really convincing emails.

Not to mention I would be making way more money. So that’s a huge plus.

While I was being all cocky in my head this afternoon, the salesperson I was on the calls with and I started to have a conversation about why she liked being in sales. She said something that really struck me. She said, “you’re doing what you’re meant to in life when you know you would do it for free.” This salesperson…let’s just say she’s not in it for the love.

This whole concept got me thinking. Would I do events if my salary was a whopping $0? The honest truth: yes. Truthfully, I do events all the time. I plan dinners, nights out, vacations just for the fun of it it all the time. I actually like making reservations and doing the research for all this stuff. I honestly and thoroughly enjoy doing site visits and the nitty gritty of an event. So I guess I shouldn’t really be in sales…at least not sales at my company. Maybe someday event sales or something might be in my future.

But for now, I think I’ll stay in this field that makes me happy.